Motherhood is not for the faint of heart. You surrender your body for nine months awaiting a slippery, helpless, hungry human to come barreling out. Then once the new babe is on the outside, you're involuntarily flooded with turbulent emotions that drive you to somehow keep a tiny human fed, dry and warm. Alive. Then they [...]
Category: Pregnancy
Nash and the Shit Eating Grin
When you're pregnant, there's a list a mile long (and then some) of the things you can't consume and/or do for the sake of the unborn baby. No sushi. No beer. No sandwich meat. No shell fish. No wine. No soft cheese. Not TOO much coffee. Literally none of the good stuff. In restaurants, you [...]
Toddlers are gross
We transitioned Piper to a "big girl" bed earlier this year to free up the crib for Nash. It was surprisingly painless. Following Nash's July birth, we also moved the monitor out of her room and into the nursery. Now, before you think we're bad parents for not keeping all eyes on Piper's sleep patterns [...]
Fat shaming, Oh Baby.
I have a running list of PSAs in my head. You know, the reoccurring thoughts you have every time something drives you batty - but there isn't a true audience to endure your internal monologue. For the last 28 years, my main internal PSA has been: Public restrooms and the habits of nasty women. A [...]
Is it too late now to say, “Sorry?”
Today I'm tired - but not because the usual 16 pound reason. Little Piper Grey sleeps 10-11 hours a night now - which is glorious. So evenings are when we clean, catch up on garbage TV (like the train wreck that is Bachelor in Paradise), attempt a workout, or catch up on the tragedies happening in the world.
Buy one, get one. Baby.
I’ve Fallen and I Can’t Get Up
While clumsily sliding into my orthopedic Vans to accommodate my swollen feet and Bachelor Ben Higgins -worthy, transitory cankles, I worried this morning that I wasn't going to be able to get back up in my closet - seriously considering if I was going to have to spend the entire Friday on the floor with dust-collecting Dry Clean [...]
Let there be shelves
Thanks to Pinterest, no wedding extravaganza, engagement photo-shoot (did these even exist before Pinterest?), winter wardrobe, home-decor effort, or nursery will (or can never) be sub-par ever again. PS - WordPress really wants me to correct sub-par to Subaru. Not happening, WordPress. What goes in a nursery? Pinterest B.C. - Crib, glider, changing table, baby dresser, diapers. [...]
Be Nice to Me, My Wife is Pregnant
We've entered into the homestretch of this pregnancy triathlon - and with 77 days left on the burner, I'm ready to award my husband with the Medal of Honor for the incessant foot rubs (can't even call them feet - they're summer sausages) and the erratic, constant food runs (Japanese, no...Olive Garden, no...chocolate milk). Not even Caitlyn [...]
The Crack Pot
That's how my Samsung Galaxy phone auto-corrected my 'crock-pot' text to my mom - so that's what we're calling it. Good job, Galaxy. It's day three of Hurricane Joaquin and his dismal rain-dump here in South Carolina. I complain occasionally about living 12 miles from downtown Columbia - and having to drive 'into town' to [...]